Big Red Grapples with Grumpy Grammarian Tiger

Coach Reynolds
In a season that’s been a three ring circus of the senses, today’s meet (big)topped them all. As cars filled with rowdy cross country fans whipped up dust in the parking area, ominous clouds, whose palpable evil only a Dickensian paragraph could accurately capture, obscured the course from view. Was the course even there? The Big Red and their competition were entering a world of uncertainty.

Lining up just down the starting line from the Big Red was a pack of USN Tigers, one of which had apparently been locked in a cage for two weeks during which time its diet consisted of only MBA Big Red Rulebooks. When it saw that same waffle logo emblazoned on our uniforms, it went berserk and feasted on Big Red flesh. The rampaging beast finished first overall and took one of his feline friends with him.

Blasting across the line with a battered nose from a bout with the Tigers, Jack Montgomery claimed 3rd place with a human cannonball-esque time of 11:31. Thomas Dennis and William Le juggled their order last week to finish in 4th and 5th respectively. “Tightrope” Walker Pierce then crossed the line as four MBA runners broke the 12-minute barrier. The clown car of sub-12:00 runners couldn’t quite squeeze in Ollie Cian as he wrapped up the scoring top five for the Big Red.

Struggling a bit with their final trick, the magicians who boil the subtlety of XC down to mere numbers took their sweet time pulling the team scores out of their hat. All we knew for about 12 hours was that MBA’s team score was 32, that the Tigers were very, very, very close, and that you need to be at next week’s HVAC Championship meet—It’s going to be a showstopper.

When the scores finally did materialize, the Big Red had proven their status as ringmasters of this particular circus:

MBA: 32
USN: 39
Other Teams: bigger numbers
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Montgomery Bell Academy

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